EverHEALTHY Colon Cleanse Digest Detox : Lose Weight!*

Hey, it's this guy again!

While there is something to the health claims involved, I'm really hesitant to recommend colon cleanse products on eBay, especially when the seller is almost trying to discourage feedback ratings by keeping the sale as "private." I mean, what is the purpose of that? Why is something like this something that one should be embarrassed about buying? It's not like they're buying adult material on eBay.

But, on the plus side, they got rid of that really unappealing image of that really big fat guy.

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Elderly patients may find use for this product, as may athletes, smokers, or people who don't get enough fresh air. Just remember that our bloodstream has a maximum absorption point of oxygen.

CATHOLIC CHURCH ALTAR LIGHT FIXTURES LARGE 3ft HEAVY

You want light fixtures? This guy has 'em.

Pretty much guaranteed to break both your back and your bank, these things are 3 feet tall and if you can believe from the auction header, HEAVY.

Interestingly enough, the person doesn't include an actual shipping price for this item. He doesn't even indicate how much it weighs, except for HEAVY. But for the hefty price of $6000, he's aiming this towards those who actually have churches. Considering that the clergy is supposed to take vows of poverty, how can they usually afford something like this?

But then, when I recall my Catholic school days, the parish pastor sure did drive a nice car.

VINTAGE BULER DIGITAL SWISS WATCH WORKS THEN STOP PARTS

With Christmas just around the corner, good luck on getting stuff shipped to you on time. But, for the diver in your family, a technomarine watch would make a really nice gift. But if you don't like that person that much, there are other options. Like this.

Having done my first attempt at an eBay auction a few weeks back (no bids, no takers), it's hard to do much when you only have one picture to work with (after that, they charge ya). But, when you have a little more capital and a lot more items to sell, you can do whatever the heck you want. But this guy actually went to the trouble of photographing all of the notes when he could've just wrote out the description.

LEATHER DOG COSTUME dog paws with matching hood MASK

Dog supplies are one of the biggest expenses of pet ownership, but if you know where to shop, you can easily cut your prices down. Or, if you're one of those people with way too much money on your hand, you can get anything from fancy jewelry to clothes for your pet. Considering that it's getting cold out, that might not be such a bad idea.

Except when I came across this. A frickin' LEATHER DOG COSTUME.

I have full respect for the community and believe that whatever people do behind closed doors is their own business, as long as it's consensual and nobody is really getting hurt. But somehow, I can't shake the suspicion that real self-respecting members of the BDSM community wouldn't actually dress their dog up like this. I dunno...

Get Government Grant Coffee and Espresso Machines Info

It's the equivalent of spam on eBay, these endless streams of "information products" which promise a lot for things that you can get for free on the Internet. But this one in particular is allowing you to get government grants for purchasing espresso machines.

This one in particular is a little bit alarming. If this is a virtual item, why is he charging shipping? Last I checked, e-mail was FREE.

Government grant information is not hard to find if you just LOOK.

Frontier Hotel Dice LasVegas Old Logo Hughes Not Cancel

On the occasions I've gone to casinos, I've made a point of grabbing a free deck of cards. Casinos have policies about rotating out decks of cards and dice so that they can't be manipulated, allowing gamblers to cheat. So, when you have items that are essentially given out for free, especially from a LasVegas hotel, one of the gambling capitals, why does it sell for so much?

This guy is selling a set of dice, which you can get for free from any casino. But, the seller does indicate that they haven't been "canceled" (I'm assuming that means pulled out of circulation). The words "trash" and "treasure" are coming to mind all of a sudden.

(New 101 Tips To Lose Weight) Free SH + Resell ($59.99)

If you want to get back into shape, eBay has everything that you need...strength equipment, supplements, exercise clothes, and motivational videos. And then they have eBooks for information that you can easily get for free all over the Internet.

The seller makes huge promises, although losing 10 pounds is NOT HARD. By now, everybody should know that the first 10 pounds of weight loss in every weight loss program is the easiest, and then after that, it becomes difficult. But, when you have all these people out there preying on the insecurities of the general public...

And what the heck are they talking about resell value? How can this be a $59.99 value when you can get this information for free from the local library?

UNIQUE SATANIC OCCULT EQUESTRIAN HORSESHOE LUCK SYMBOL

For the equestrian on your gift buying list, you can get horse riding apparel, horseback riding lessons, or even a whole horse. Or, you can get this.

The seller doesn't seem to know the origins of this item in particular, although indicates that there are a lot of contradictions within the item itself. An inverted horse shoe, meaning bad luck, but saying "good luck" on it, and then putting in an inverted pentagram, which is the opposite of a Satanic symbol.

It's hard to put a value on something like this, unless you have expertise in this area, but somehow, I don't see it being worth the opening bid of $80. It's not even made of anything precious...it's brass.

Cow String Light Set/indoor/outdoor/Party/Vet/Dorm room

You want tacky? eBay has tacky. You could probably do much better in the ways of outdoor lighting, but if you want stung up lights that vaguely resemble glow-in-the-dark cows, eBay has them.

It would've been kinda nice if they were out of the package so you could see what they actually look like, and as it is, this little picture looks a little bit nondescript and random, so it's kind of a hard sell. But, considering that eBay usually charges you for every extra image, I'm guessing that they couldn't exactly spring for it.

MAILBOX DECORATION Replacement Alert Flag COW farm

When only parts break on your stuff, it's always nice to know that parts are relatively easy to come by. But the fact that they sell replacement alert flags for your mailboxes? Having grew up in a household where mail was delivered through a slot, mailboxes were something that I only seen on television and movies, usually on shows where tacky mailboxes are targets of vandalism. These would involve scenes where you got some guy standing in the back of a pickup truck with a baseball bat.

With that in mind, why is the replacement of an alert such a big deal? If the entire mailbox is toast, wouldn't you get a new one anyway? If someone were to go to all the trouble, why steal just the flag?

200 BUTTERFLY Wedding Silk Rose Flower Petals-Brown

I'm running on empty here, and still no interesting things to write about on eBay. But, yet again, I've found another example that very much illustrates how overinflated shipping prices are on eBay. This eBay seller is selling silk wedding flowers for the low price of 1 cent. However, shipping is $6.95.

If the seller is willing to take a loss on the item by selling it ridiculously below cost, you know that they're definitely making it up for it on shipping. Shipping a small package like this should not cost more than a couple of bucks.

ZENITH CL015 TV REMOTE CONTROL WITH CLOSED CAPTIONING

Here again, I'm playing grammar cop when I don't find anything weird or interesting on eBay. But, what is interesting to note is that the seller of this particular item claims to have "closed captioning." This would seem to imply that there is some sort of display on the actual remote that would allow you to read the closed captions on a television program, or it would magically grant your TV the actual function.

While I do realize that they need to sell their stuff, and when the entire TV goes toast, chances are that they want to salvage as much as they can to recoup their losses, which probably explains why the TV remote is still there but there isn't a TV.

Note that this isn't actually a universal remote, as it only has enough functionality for one device, namely the television itself. You are probably better off with a universal remote, unless you have the very specific TV that this remote came with. And of course, as Murphy's Law dictates, the second you get the remote shipped to you, you will find it within the sofa cushions.

Work From Home Learn How to SELL BABY CLOTHES Ebay Info

Because yes, last I checked, baby clothes was really a growth industry.

Considering how fast babies tend to grow, it may not be in anyone's best interest to get clothing for children on eBay, unless they are trying to plan ahead and anticipate how big their kids will be by the time that the clothing arrives. But, this person wants to sell their secrets as to how one can be successful at selling baby clothes.

But, on the plus side, it very much appears to be SORTA legitimate, but really, how hard is it to just do the damn research? Like, really?

Bulletproof backpack

Maybe this is something that a bag manufacturer like Ogio can get behind, but pretty cool nonetheless. Or pretty scary. You know that something is really messed up in our society when there exists a market for an item like this.

It's a backpack with a built-in ballistics panel, so it's designed to protect the user, although the seller admits that it might not be the best form of protection for school/random violence.

Considering that kids carry huge books in their backpacks, there's a good chance that a few textbooks will be sufficient to stop a bullet, so it's a bit of a redundant feature. The seller goes onto describe the way it could be used, although the target product user will not necessarily be thinking of this if a classmate decides that he/she can't take it anymore.

Nice idea, but are we trying to protect our kids or just make them paranoid?

TERM LIFE INSURANCE -NO MEDICAL OR AGENT- FREE QUOTES

Hey, it looks like you CAN buy anything on eBay.

Looking for term life insurance quotes? Look no further. However, the auction in question doesn't seem to be an actual auction, as the seller doesn't actually appear to be using eBay to sell a tangible product or service. As it stands, it says "free quotes."

I guess it's much cheaper than web hosting, if you're using eBay to broadcast a different service that isn't for sale through eBay, although I can't shake the feeling that this too violates eBay's terms and conditions.

Make Money Kevin Spacey Free Movie Click Here!!

The keywords "click here" will yield a lot of different searches on eBay, ranging from art to cheap sunglasses. And then there was this one.

I don't really know what to make of it at all. It doesn't appear to be selling a particular product, only giving a link where it shows you the trailer to Pay it Forward, and then tries to sell you on a program of some sort that promises to generate income. Like, a lot.

I really don't know if this auction violates the eBay Terms of Service agreement, although it probably does. It's not selling an actual product and is mostly a launch pad for a get rich quick scheme. But I think you already knew it was a scam the second you looked at it...

But hey, we can almost turn our computers into ATMs. Sign me up!

Home Theater Chairs Movie Theater Seating Cinema Film

Discount home theater seating is something in high demand, but one look at this guy's auction and it looks like he took it one step further.

Compared to all of the other items you see when you look for home theater seating, they usually show stuff that would not look out of place within a posh home with a large plasma screen TV. But these very much appear to have been forcibly removed from an actual movie cinema, or at least salvaged from where a movie theater closed down. They even still have the bottom sections where you're supposed to bolt them to the floor.

The only thing the items are missing are wads of chewing gum stuck to the bottom.

NEW5" SPECIAL MEMORY FOAM 5.3lb MEDITATION YOGA CUSHION

With space age technology and poor categorization, the same material in a memory foam mattress can now be used as a meditation cushion.

I guess when an eBay seller wants to promote their product, they're going to want to make sure that it has as much cross market appeal as possible. So, they start marketing to the religious crowd. Yes, this product is categorized under "Everything Else" and "Religious Products and Supplies."

The interesting thing is that yoga in the Western world isn't all that religious. As it stands, yoga mats are actually quite thin. Come to think of it, shouldn't the image show an imprint of somebody's butt?

CELL PHONE, PDA, BLUETOOTH, & BLACKBERRY WHOLESALE LIST

Whether you're looking for a Bluetooth headset or any other type of accessory for your cell phone, PDA, or Blackberry, you can easily find it on eBay. And if you're looking for wholesale lists which have artificially high monetary values, you can also find them on eBay.

This particularly enterprising eBayer is selling wholesaler lists of mobile communications accessories (PDA, Bluetooth, cellphones, etc.). Directly quoted from the auction:

"This information is not missing leading and is worth every penny. I have bought a wholesale list before on eBay and learned the hard way. They just fill it with basic garbage with links to thousands and thousands sites with non-wholesale prices and run with your money. Basically its delete and so is the user by eBay. Anyways, this information is so nice that I even use the sources from all my equipment!!"

Most will want to steer clear of these, even more so when you check the guy's artificially high feedback rating. Every single one of his positive feedbacks are for "private auctions," which is a bright red flag. That, and this guy's grammar frickin' sucks.

Piece of my brain! Plus 2CT Diamond Wedding Ring! MORE!

Probably one of the more entertaining entries for diamond rings that you'll see on eBay, this seller's story seems somewhat familiar for those who track weird auctions like this.

This person is claiming to be selling a piece of their brain. Obviously, according to eBay's terms and conditions, this can't be allowed, so the automated software (or not, I don't know how smart this stuff is when it comes to categorizing auctions) shut it down previously. Of course, the seller is actually attempting to sell all the related memories of a bitter divorce, which includes the engagement ring. This does appear to be legit, though, as there is documentation from an jewelry appraisal, and has thus already garnered 40 bids. Although this may be more due to the notoriety that the auction has gained, as it has already been featured on several other sites that track odd eBay auctions.

It appears to be a reverse of another infamous auction from way back, in which an embittered man was selling his ex-wife's wedding dress, which also got him a fair amount of attention (as well as a few wedding proposals).

$1 Wynn Casino Chip From Las Vegas

I think I already talked about this one before, but it looks like someone else is selling casino chips for more than their face value. I'm not sure as to why this is actually lucrative to the point that casino chips have their own dedicated category within eBay. Direct from the Wynn Las Vegas Casino, we have a $1 chip.

Surprisingly, this one already has two bids on it (as of this current writing), with the high bid of 99 cents. I've always questioned buying certain types of memorabilia on eBay, considering that it's usually to commemorate a place that you've actually been to. And, tacking shipping onto this, would not likely be very cost effective for a gambler (considering how often you get free money from a casino, this is a pretty ass-backwards approach).

MITSUBISHI WD-62530 62" LCD-PROJECTION HDTV FOR REPAIR

The company that's selling this particular item calls themselves "Auction Drop." Never has a more apt description of an eBay auction been put in the item's title. As in, it might have been what happened to the item in question.

While they are completely up front and honest about the functionality of the product (ie: in the fact that IT DOESN'T), I don't really expect that people are going to go through the time and effort required to get this item. At $318.99, it might actually be worth it to go through the time and effort to actually go and retrieve the item in question, but considering the actual repair costs of projection televisions, and that the fact that 80% of the time, units are cheaper to replace than repair, it might not.

Unfortunately, no one has gotten around to making a diagnostic as to WHAT is wrong with the TV, only the vague, "The screen display for this television is impaired or unclear." This could mean anything from a $2000 repair job or a $20 part, but hey, you never know. But, you still gotta spend $318.99 to find out.

Northern Heights Counter Bar Stool Pair Furniture New

Okay, I'm running a little bit thin on the "odd" eBay auctions as of late, because I haven't been able to locate any weird auctions related to bar stools, so instead, just a little lesson about paying attention to detail when you're putting up your auctions. Like, putting up the right picture of the product?

I guess it's easier for individuals, when they're just selling a small number of items, so when you're a larger company selling thousands of dollars worth of stuff on a daily basis, it's easier to miss stuff.

But c'mon, guys. This is a dining room set!

iJoy 270 iPOD Human Touch Home Theater Massage Chair

It appears that technology has come a long way in a very short amount of time. And we still haven't found a way to mitigate global warming, cure cancer, or solve the energy crisis.

A little bit overkill if you're just looking for home theater chairs, this has just about everything you could possibly need...jacks for your iPod, 4 massage settings for each area of your spine, and even a remote control. However, I've always wondered about remote controls...considering the fact that you're actually sitting directly on the device yourself, is a remote control really necessary? It's the equivalent of putting an eject button on a remote control of a DVD player. You gotta get up to retrieve the disc anyway.

HAUNTED SILVER COPPER GOLD BRAID CUFF BRACELET WITCH

Not exactly gold bracelets, as this supposedly contains silver and copper as well, but if you believe in the power that this item supposedly contains, then you probably don't care about the metal content.

By itself, this is a nice looking bracelet, although the auction page is a bit of a headache to look at. Clean simple layouts are all anyone really needs when they are browsing eBay, although forcing the users to listen to music or view Flash content is enough to turn normal run-of-the-mill eBay users off. But then, if you believe in the powers contained by the item itself, and this is something you're looking to get into, then you're probably not a normal run-of-the-mill eBay user either.

Super Bowl 9 PSA TICKET Steelers Vikings Superbowl IX

Slightly more believable in the trash-and-treasure file, we have stubs for Superbowl tickets, slightly more believable, considering that professional sporting events generally have a lot more relevance to a lot more people than, oh, say, furniture ads from 40-year-old magazines.

Some of these are very serious collectors items for sports fans. I remember collecting hockey cards when I was younger, and how certain cards such as rookie cards for important players would fetch more significant funds. But, another factor was the card's condition. And, considering the time in which I was regularly buying hockey cards, some of these cards were produced in such large quantities, that any sort of damage or wear and tear was unacceptable, considering how easy it was to obtain a new one.

The damage on this piece of merchandise is quite obvious, even through the photo, but given the rarity of this item (number produced vs. number in circulation), would probably make the price tag somewhat justifiable. But only if you're a football fan.

PAY FOR PERFORMANCE George Milkovich 1991 SC

How can a book have come out 16 years ago and still be sold as "new"?

Actually entitled "Pay for Performance," the book is probably a really useful tool for those in human resources, supervisors, bosses - basically anyone who pays people to work for them. But, since the book came out well before the online age, much of the information is likely far out of date, while the dollar values that would be discussed are in 1991 values. Given the rates of inflation and the state of the job market, I would expect that this would have to be updated on an annual basis, but doesn't seem to matter for this seller.

After all, when the eBay seller calls herself "DesperateDiva", and with a feedback rating in the 3000s, I don't think it matters to her either.

AUDEMARS PIGUET Royal Oak Sports Cap Hat

Does anybody else remember that episode of Friends where Joey buys a bunch of Ferrari merchandise like a keychain, a baseball hat, and a jacket in order to convince people that he's the owner of an actual Ferarri car?

After perusing eBay for Audemars Piguet watches and looking at the actual prices for some of these watches (some of which are more the price of a new luxury car), it very much appears that this may be the lowest price item up for bid.

Not to fret, however. If you don't want to be quite like Joey, you can still bid on one of the lower priced watches...if you just happen to have $1000 in spare change kicking around.

Short Bed Roll-Top Toneau Top + System One Ladder Rack

Anybody else thinks that this guy got greedy?

I understand the psychology behind having reserves on items, reserves being the minimum dollar amount that the seller will be willing to move the item for. If the person simply just sets the starting bid at the reserve price, then there will be less incentive on the part of the prospective buyer to bid on the item.

But, when the guy puts the "buy it now" price at $1550 (almost 3x the starting bid), it gets a little bit suspect.

This guy is selling a used ladder rack for a 2003 Dodge Dakota, which he claims was "purchased new," although that doesn't really make a lick of difference if was purchased new back then, because the prospective buyer will be purchasing it used right now. Good luck, buddy.

1919 Antique Real Estate ad Miami Fl Clearwater Dora Lk

Latest in the line of the trash and treasure series, someone is selling an ad clipping promoting a Miami real estate company from 1919.

This company has probably long-since passed to the annals of business statistics (and if I had the spare time to go out and do the research, I would find that out for sure). I'm really curious as to how this publication has managed to survive for so long in someone's basement, although it may indicate that it belonged to a person who really had a hard time letting go of stuff, which is why we tend to see so many of these types of things going on eBay. With zero bids and only a buy-it-now price, items like these are commonly tossed onto eBay without much care and attention, using more of a shotgun approach to sell.

However, if you are looking for actual real estate, eBay may not be the best place to look, considering the level of customer service you may or (probably) not receive.

Denver Park Lane Motel and Hotel Ad Brochure Now Condos

Unfortunately, it's the cheapest item that is available when you type in "Condo Hotels." And, it very much looks like something that a person managed to dig up when they were cleaning up their apartment and tried to make some quick cash off of it. Yes, they're selling a pamphlet, with artwork on the front that looks like it was done by an elementary school student.

This makes up a very large percentage of the auctions you see on eBay, where something that otherwise holds no value for most normal people, but someone is just putting the feelers out there to see if there'll be anyone who sees value in it.

Given the use of the old-style font and the actual type-written text on the inside, this is definitely an authentic relic from the times. But, is it worth anything? For whoever would want an item of such for framing purposes, it's absolutely priceless. Plus $2.50 s/h.

BIG HERBERT 56" INFLATABLE "ALL THE WAY" GOLF CLUB NIP

Somehow, I managed to be the FIRST person to view this auction.

Not really the kind of golf clubs that you'd expect to bring with you at the local 18 hole course, this seller is offering an inflatable golf club. Under the category of "gag gifts," its use is quite self-explanatory, although the seller does go on to add the disclaimer, "Novelty Use Only."

I'm just trying to recall that golfer who did all sorts of really wacky tricks with a standard golf club and a ball, but somehow I don't think this tool would make it into his arsenal.

TRAVELPRO COMFORT IN A BAG TRAVEL KIT BLANKET MASK ETC.

Never mind the fact that this product comes in a BOX rather than an actual BAG, but this seller is offering a Travelpro brand travel accessories kit, known as "Comfort in a Bag."

Even for people who do like to travel, air travel can be really hard on the body. Being crammed into a tiny seat for an 18 hour flight is enough to cause deep vein thrombosis for some people (a potentially life threatening condition), cruddy airline service, and then there's also the rude customers, kids smacking their seats into yours, and so on. That, and none of these amenities are provided by airlines anymore, especially since the rising costs of fuel are causing them to cut back significantly on services. However, notice the ridiculous profits that they are still posting. Hmm...

This bag is missing a lot of things for the more jaded traveler, such as sleeping pills, a bottle of tequila, a dirty magazine, and a box of condoms.

SHOCKING UTILITY KNIFE razor blade blades shock joke

Designed for people that just don't pay attention, it's yet another gag item that's designed to deliver an electrical shock, but is disguised as an everyday object. In this, case, box cutters.

A closer look at the packaging artwork will reveal the words "Made in China," and given the recent news headlines about children's toys being laced with lead or having small magnetic buttons that break off and are swallowed, could give a few people cause for alarm. On the plus side, this could mean it could give a person a much bigger jolt than anticipated (okay, maybe not such a good thing).

I've always been more partial to the calculators or LCD gaming devices that squirt water at the unwitting victim myself.

The 100 Best Treatment Centers for Alcoholism and Drug

eBay can also be a good source for hard-to-find and out of print books from a variety of topics ranging from literature to things on finding drug treatment centers. I wasn't even sure of this myself until I looked it up and, surely enough, there's an actual book entitled The 100 Best Treatment Centers for Alcoholism and Drug Abuse. The seller is offering it for a whopping $99.99, which is about 5 cents more expensive than what one seller is offering on Amazon.com.

Dropping around $100 for a book is always tough, unless it happens to be a nice hardbound edition or a college level textbook (which will become outdated in under a year), but considering that this book is almost 20 years old (the book was printed in 1988), I really can't see the value, considering that businesses are known to change everything from contact information to location. Sure, drug treatment and rehabilitation can be the best step one can take to getting their life back on track, and is definitely worth the time and travel for a good facility. But, wouldn't something a little more recent be in order?

1970s Teen Drug Treatment & Rehab Program Films

Not quite Reefer Madness, this seller is offering a series of videos about drug rehabilitation and treatment. While debate may rage endlessly about the use of decriminalization and education as opposed to outright ban and prohibition, videos like these are truly reflective of the time in which they were produced. Today, they prompt comedic response.

For example, "This film explores the life of a 30 something man who is trying to recapture control over his hippie lifestyle."

These would truly be collector's items had they been in their original format, but since the original formats are becoming increasingly outdated, this might be a tough sell. However, something like this might be a big hit at parties.

BOTOX® Highlighter--SYRINGE Shaped--Drug-Pharmaceutical

I can guess that we can be grateful that there are SOME level of moral values on eBay. While pharmaceuticals and supplements are huge on eBay, looking for Botox for headaches (although last I checked, they're supposed to be used for headaches) yields plenty of "Botox alternatives" and Botox related material (t-shirts, books, pens), but thankfully, no syringes full of botulism toxin, or worse yet, fake botulism in a syringe.

I'm suddenly thinking of that episode of Nip/Tuck where disgraced plastic surgeon Dr. Bobolit was administering fake Botox injections, causing disfiguring injuries to his victims.

DOWNLOAD-SUBLIMINAL REAL ESTATE SUCCESS-BROKER INVESTOR

Weren't subliminal messages questioned for their efficacy a few years back, well after the PMRC rose a huge stink about backwards masking, and how listening to music would make you go out and worship Satan? (yenom erom ecniV evig)

This one guy is selling subliminal MP3s that are designed to help you sell real estate. Digital download, so it literally costs the guy nothing to make. Regardless of the fact that subliminal messaging is not as effective as they make it out to be, I'm still thinking this guy is a bit sketchy. I mean, does this sound right to you when he says...

"If you do want feedback, just leave me a positive and my service will automatically mirror your feedback ( positive for positive, neutral for neutral, negative for negative)."

So, if you feel that you've been ripped off by this guy and leave appropriate feedback, he'll leave you negative feedback just out of spite, even when you paid in full? Nice way to protect your feedback rating, jerk.

INGERSOLL RAND REFRIGERATED AIR DRYER COMPRESSOR TOOL

Could it be? A rarity on eBay? An item where they're not actually going to try to rip you off on shipping?

This gentleman is selling a used piece of machinery from Ingersoll Rand air tools and is pretty honest about the condition, with one minor caveat - you gotta pick it up yourself. Judging from the photos, it is not a lightweight piece of machinery, so something like that would likely be really expensive to ship.

I'm still remembering how I wanted to buy a video game from a local seller who REFUSED to do local shipping, even though we both live within the same area code. Sheesh! For that, there's Craigslist.

EverHEALTHY Colon Cleanse Digest Detox : Lose Weight!!

I don't know about you guys, but I can think of many more pleasant images that one could use to sell a product. In the case of this eBay user, using fear tactics to sell a product will likely result in LOSS of sales.

This eBayer is selling a colon cleanse product which is supposed to remove excess waste from the human body. The seller indicates that the photo of the guy on the left is not actually fat, but all that backed up crap in his system.

Much of this holistic healing stuff is great in theory, but sounds pretty outlandish. If a person was that loaded up with crap, they would likely be having a myriad of health problems, with weight loss being the least of their worries.

Mind you, if everybody just ate properly, we wouldn't be having half of the health problems that we're having now.

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Like businesses will want to be going on eBay for all of their network solutions. Considering what businesses need, like hosting, CMS, business e-mail, and the like...none of those are even mentioned on the eBay listing. However, other companies are available that offer networking solutions, such as this post's sponsor.

1968 Dodge Charger Facts Features Manual Sales Brochure

Next, filed under "One Man's Trash...", we have Dodge Charger Accessories. Or more appropriately, Dodge Charger memorabilia.

This is something that's truly only for the die hard collector, as it ultimately serves no purpose today, given the actual number of 1968 Dodge Charger RTs on the city streets. Something like this would have been given away for free way back then, and yet the seller is offering it for a starting bid of $9 plus $5.45 s/h.

Panties Vibrator Panty sexy lingerie remote control

What WILL they think of next!
Sure, it's about as useful as putting an eject button on a remote control (considering that you gotta actually get up to remove the disc/tape/whatever), but hey, who woulda thought about it...REMOTE CONTROL PANTIES?!

Just to keep it PG13, this is a piece of sexy lingerie with a built-in and removable...uh...nerve stimulator which can be operated via remote. While they don't show how small the actual device is, the description indicates that it's small enough to be embedded discreetly, so that a woman can have her distraction from her boring work day if so inclined.

Okay, that wasn't part of the sales pitch, but it'd be one possible use for it. My first instinct was that this could be used to spice up the bedroom activities of an adventurous young couple, but hey, whatever works.

TechCraft PTV48 Home Theater Furniture AS-IS

Home Theater Furniture can be had for all sorts of great prices, although with everything, it's always worth doing your research. In this case, the seller has attempted to include as much detail as humanly possible, but you can tell that it's some liquidation company that's selling it because they just don't have the resources or time to go into detail on the individual item. If it were a private seller, they can usually answer all of your questions on the item, but one cannot be guaranteed any sort of customer service if something goes wrong.

Topeka, Kansas 1939 High School Graduation Announcement

Objects of minimal value seem to pop up repeatedly in eBay, once again proving the adage, one man's trash is another man's treasure. Value is largely determined by supply and demand, and while some items may be extremely rare, what if the market for the item simply doesn't exist?

Take this item, for instance, graduation announcements from a high school in 1939. A person who graduated from high school in 1939 would be over eighty years old. Given the average lifespan of most people today, that would mean that the people most likely to benefit from this product would already have passed on by now. An average high school graduating class can number in the hundreds. The number of surviving alumni from Topeka, Kansas 1939?

If I had the spare time, I'd look it up. But, why do I have the distinct suspicion that this was a leftover item from a person's estate?

Topeka, Kansas 1939 High School Graduation Announcement

Objects of minimal value seem to pop up repeatedly in eBay, once again proving the adage, one man's trash is another man's treasure. Value is largely determined by supply and demand, and while some items may be extremely rare, what if the market for the item simply doesn't exist?

Take this item, for instance, graduation announcements from a high school in 1939. A person who graduated from high school in 1939 would be close to a hundred years old. Given the average lifespan of most people, that would mean that the people most likely to benefit from this product would already have passed on by now. An average high school graduating class can number in the hundreds. The number of surviving alumni from Topeka, Kansas 1939?

If I had the spare time, I'd look it up. But, why do I have the distinct suspicion that this was a leftover item from a person's estate?

MOOSE LOG NIGHTSTAND END TABLE CABIN LODGE ANTLERS DEER

Doing some bedroom furniture shopping on eBay? Well, look no further. Okay, if you have any level of class or sense of design, you may probably want to look further. But, if you're fancying yourself a domestic Daniel Boone, take a closer look.

Understandably, as the seller, he/she is going to extol all of the virtues of the product, imagined or not. I thought it was kinda cool how they were able to find a cell phone which looked equally rustic as the table itself.

The seller does recommend that it can be used to store AMMO, though. Looks like the Daniel Boone archetype has been replaced with Cletus from The Simpsons.

KITCHEN SINK PRESS POCKET PINUPS SET

Kitchen sinks? No, kitchen sink. As in Kitchen Sink Press.

Kitchen Sink Press was one of the many casualties of the speculator boom of the mid-90s, where Marvel's acquisition of Heroes World meant that comic book publishers had to go exclusive with one publisher in order to stay afloat. By purchasing a low-level comic book distributor, they forced the other comic book publishers to go with either Diamond or Capital City distributors. Major players DC, Dark Horse, and Image ended up staying with Diamond, whereas Kitchen Sink went with Capital City.

Now, Diamond is the only comic book distributor in town, with a major monopoly. Kitchen Sink is no longer producing comic books...and now their stuff sells on eBay for cheap.

Murray Feiss

Finding things on eBay such as Murray Feiss lighting can yield tons of results, so finding a good match is tough. Prices are extremely variant, which may indicate either a lack of legitimate items on eBay or strong buying power on the part of sellers. It's hard to say, when somebody purports to sell something for 1/3rd of retail price (ie: $25 for a lamp that retails for over $100) while somebody else is selling a wall mirror for $300, it gets a little confusing. Bid with CAUTION, not confidence, folks.

THE ORLEANS HOTEL & CASINO LAS VEGAS $1 2005 ISSUE

So, $1 = $1.99 + $2.25 shipping and handling?

I've never understood the concept of selling souvenirs online, as they are usually supposed to commemorate the time when you were actually there in the Orleans Hotel Las Vegas. (I hate these weird string keyword assignments, I really do.)

I'm guessing that they're attempting to appeal to collectors, but methinks that they're just trying to clean out their apartments and want to make a profit. Hence, the big garage sale that is eBay. Bid away, guys.

Opportunity in Brazil : Registered Consulting Business

Could it be? Use of the words "business opportunity" and it's not spam?

Okay, never mind the fact that eBay probably one of the least secure ways to start ones own business, or get a business from someone else. But, considering the fact that the majority of the uses of the word usually involve some e-document that will supposedly teach you the secrets of successfully running (or ruining) your own business. This is an actual rarity, where they are offering the kind of things necessary for a business, such as office equipment, an actual office, and even insurance.

This will be taking place entirely in Brazil, which is on its way to becoming a major economic power (if not already there), although it's considered a bit of a high-risk and volatile market by many investors. As always, caveat emptor.

However, I do find it amusing that they still offer buyer protection via Paypal. Up to $200 buyer protection. For an item that's $39,999.99, the words "drop in the bucket" come to mind.

FURNITURE PECS CARDS ~ 20 CARDS ~ AUTISM SPEECH DELAY

Language and other skills are tough to learn for most people, let alone people with cognitive and learning disabilities. For them, we language cards to assist in learning.

However, for this particular auction, the seller is marketing flash cards depicting furniture (it doesn't go into specifics, like dining room furniture), and it's a noble thing to do, especially since autistics have a really hard time going through life in general.

The seller is making these from scratch and has touted how high quality the product is,
although I wonder how much we can trust the seller when he/she is selling cards with pictures of "furniture," yet the accompanying image shows a picture of an APPLE.

Dayak Headhunter Head Hunter War Trophy Human Skull 2

You want ugly? eBay has got ugly.

Typically, trophies are highly individualized items, or sometimes quick, cheesy tokens with no special value apart from something that you just put on your shelf. Hunting trophies are slightly different, though, although this goes into the truly cheesy.

Being that you're buying this on the Internet, it's obviously fake and plastic, and it appears to be a mass-produced item, although the seller seems to see this as a "quality item."

SPO CHECKMATE 1000 Fingertip/Finger Pulse OXIMETER NEW

While it's not hard to find a pulse oximeter on eBay, always pay attention to the fine print, especially when it comes to purchasing stuff that is subject to rules and regulations that you probably wouldn't think that much of. Even though the auction purports this item to be ideal for athletes and pilots, there's a little disclaimer halfway through the auction...

The following is a mandatory eBay declaimer for ALL medical device sold on eBay. You are free to purchase this finger pulse oximeter. "The sale of this item may be subject to regulation by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration and state and local regulatory agencies. If so, do not bid on this item unless you are an authorized purchaser. If the item is subject to FDA regulation, I will verify your status as an authorized purchaser of this item before shipping of the item."

The plus side, they're probably not going to rip you off, although it's still something worth considering before making your purchase on eBay.

New FLOATY PEN-RARE For ENLIVE! Nutritional Supplement

Thankfully, eBay will recognize commonly misspelled words and typos such as "nurtitional supplements" (as opposed to "nutrition supplements"), and make the appropriate correction. So lo and behold, what does it spit out?

One particular item is for a ballpoint pen promoting a nutritional supplement store, or some other supplement supplier. Me, I think he's getting greedy, considering that these pens are routinely dispensed like candy at trade shows and conventions, and considering that they don't necessarily produce any higher quality ink than the free pens that you swipe from the hotels or the ones that you swipe from work.

For 99 cents? You can get pens for cheaper. Uh...try FREE.

Ring For Service Counter Call Bell Hotel Desk Reception

This is a fairly standard item, but for under $10, you can get get standard equipment that you'd find at reception desks. More specifically, a ring-for-service bell.


While the seller purports to sell items that are "unusual and hard-to-get", this is something that you can usually find in any Staples/Office Depot. But, it's notable how they market this particular item -- as it's something that's used to gain an edge in a married relationship.

I'm a firm believer that everyone should do their part in any sort of relationship based on one's abilities. For example, it would be fairly unreasonable to ask someone who doesn't know how to cook to do so, but would be fair for the other things (laundry, vacuuming, etc.), and thankfully, the seller is not intending this to be a serious auction.

As the seller notes: "Why strain your voice with yelling or nagging when you can ring the bell as a signal to bring food or as a reminder that work needs to be done?" The seller signs off with, "Not recommended by marriage counselors." Good call.

PALM SIZE YR 1904 SEXY GENIE POWERFUL JADE ANTIQUE LAMP

Okay, when they say "lamp," it's not exactly something for home lighting. No, these are oil lamps, used way before the age of electricity. But, this isn't what the seller's intent is.

The seller has several different images of different products, making it somewhat difficult to track down what the product is supposed to be. The seller claims that it will have wish-granting properties, and then shows a different type of lamp (pictured below), one of which more associated with the traditional ones that you'd see in the books and old artwork.

Among some of the more outrageous claims: "The power of this genie lamp might be too powerful for u to handle, so please be sure that u are well prepared."

Thankfully, most people are ruled by common sense and won't often buy into the claims like this. But then, it only takes one...

NEW HEMINGWAY Animal Print Luxury Bed in a Bag Cal King

Okay, really slim pickings in the bizarre file in eBay today, so, I just bring you mildly tacky instead of bizarre. But, if you believe everything you read, you too can save yourself hundreds of dollars and purchase this animal print bedding on eBay for under $40 (with shipping), vs. the retail price of $450.00.

Something like this is often a little bit suspect, and also you'd have to be very careful about how they word stuff. They say "comparable," which doesn't necessarily mean that it's the exact same item that would normally retail for over $400. Plus, what's there to say that the $400+ bedding set would include more things (ie: higher thread count, more pillow cases, etc.) than the one in the listed set?

Caveat emptor, as always, folks. Proceed and bid with caution.

Financial Accounting And Reporting by Joyce A. Straw...

With the search engine on eBay, it's not the most intelligent. Say, I'm looking for financial reporting software, and I punch in keywords to that effect, it'll spit out anything but. Possibly because eBay isn't the best place to get services like that, unless you're really really desperate.

What it spat out instead was a listing for an old business text book from 2004. The seller is offering it for $27.45 (buy it now price), plus $8.75 shipping. I was about to gripe about the shipping charge, and considering that it's a fairly hefty volume, it's fairly reasonable. But, considering the fact that textbooks are replaced on a semester-by-semester basis, one can be pretty sure that this book will be pretty out of date.

Otherwise, eBay is a pretty good resource for those selling and buying used textbooks for post-secondary education. Considering the exhorbant prices charged by University book stores and the absolute pitiful buy-back prices on textbooks, this is probably a better deal than you could get from a University book store (either through the buy-back program or purchasing used). But then, the book is 3 years old.

VTG WATCH LOT 9 BULOVA HAMILTON ETC..G6

On eBay, you can get Hamilton watches, or watches from any other company, for that matter. However, the likelihood of getting a good price is inversely proportional to the number of questions that you should be asking about the product.

As a result, this lot of 9 watches sans straps, and not even in working order, has received an opening bid of $4.99.

I dunno how good his English is, so you might have a ton of questions, but I'm not sure how truthful of an answer you'll get from "Where did you get them." Maybe the seller just "finds" them. Who knows.

Accidentz.com ACCIDENT Attorney Lawyer Legal Law WEB

Proving once again, it pays to pay attention to the listing. And, legitimate lawyers who are successful and will help you will not necessarily advertise through eBay.

So, you get in an accident and need someone that specializes, like say, a truck accident lawyer. While "accidentz.com" is a fairly easy-to-remember domain name, I'd prefer to be a little more discriminating when it comes to hiring help for such an important case.

Domain squatting (aka cybersquatting) is an old practice that has long since ceased to become profitable. Some will remember the days when enterprising computer users would buy up domain names for well known companies that were a little slow to get on-line, then charge up the nose to these companies. But, when the only things that are available are the likes of "accidentz.com," it indicates that companies are a little more on the ball.

This guy is selling it for $299 USD...and that's the buy-it-now price.

Chris Farley BIRTH CERTIFICATE Saturday Night Live Star

This actually borders on somewhat tasteless, and we'll ignore the fact that this is improperly labeled as a "birth certificate," especially when the thing clearly says "deceased" on it.

For fans of the larger-than-life Saturday Night Live star Chris Farley, this is a morbid way to remember a well known comedian who had such memorable characters such as that guy who was "living in a van down by the river."

Allegedly, one of the more popular skits happened by accident. When Farley was in a rig that was intended to hoist him in the air, something when wrong and he ended up hanging there, suspended by the rope rig. For the next few minutes, he hung there and just told fat jokes while waiting for the crew to get him down.

But if you're looking for other types of memorabilia like home theater seating, so you can recreate the Live from New York experience, you can forget it. The audience seating is technically on loan from Yankees Stadium, as it was believed that the show was only going to be on the air for a short time. 20-something seasons later...

Depends Extra Absorbency Lg Underware 18 count

One of the byproducts of an aging population is that we have an increased need for incontinence supplies. So, if you too have problems keeping it in, you can buy products on eBay specifically for that. Heck, they have their own CATEGORY for that.

From the product description:

"New in Bag. From my father-in-laws estate. Depend underware [SIC] size large for waist 44 to 54 inches. 18 per bag. Absorbency Extra or Super Plus. Pull on and off. UPC# 36000-19272."

This guy is not really instilling much faith for me in the American public school system, especially when the correct spelling for the product is written on the FRICKIN' PACKAGE. Personally, if I was left with personal care supplies for special needs from a loved one, I'd be more inclined to donate it to the charity of my choice. The fact that he is trying to unload it on eBay leads me to believe that the seller didn't exactly win out in a big way when his father passed away.

Mortgage Broker TeleScript Generates60+Mortgage Leads

Shelley Levene: The leads are weak.
Blake: "The leads are weak." The f***ing leads are weak? You're weak. I've been in this business fifteen years...
Dave Moss: What's your name?
Blake: F*** you. That's my name.

While they don't promise you the infamous Glengarry leads (easily one of the best films on the subject matter), this guy is claiming to be a mortgage and real estate broker who is selling a telemarketing script in order to generate more leads.

Having worked in sales ("it's a tough racket"), I don't envy the position that a lot of real estate types are in, although I'm not sure that telemarketing is nearly as effective as it used to be, especially with the advent of do-not-call lists.

Information sales on eBay sort of bother me, especially for something that could deal with an intangible thing that could easily be e-mailed. Methinks he's going to charge shipping for this.

And now a word from our sponsor...

As we take a break from trying to find Jesus Christ in a grilled cheese sandwich and people selling their virginity on eBay, we now take time to get a word from and for today’s sponsor, Canvas on Demand.

These guys are offering high-quality digital prints on mounted canvas, suitable for hanging on the surface of your choice (alas, actual hooks and anchors from which it can be hung are not included, so I ended up leaning mine over the fire place). The procedure is relatively simple. All the company requires is a digital image (ie: TIFF, JPG), and then provide the desired specifications (size, finish, digital image effects, etc.).

The version you are looking at is the basic canvas with no special options. Instead of submitting multiple photos and having them create a collage, I opted to create my own using Adobe Photoshop, and then submitted the .JPG. Those without computer skills can have their own collage created for a fee. While most would probably have one moment commemorated, for which this would be an ideal gift (ie: graduation, wedding, or anniversary gift), but I opted for multiple events.

Using the minimal options, a 16x20 print (pictured here) will run you about $89 USD, which is decent, although only time will tell if this will stand up to harsh light conditions, which customized frames are designed to do. However, given how “disposable” digital photography tends to be, this might not be such a big deal. At $89, you can still shop around, however, but then, mine was provided as a sample. But it’s a niiiiice sample.

OMICRON BARSTOOLS BAR STOOLS KITCHEN STOOLS SWIVEL NEW

If you want to see my nomination for worst eBay page layout, here it is.

Popular websites such as eBay and MySpace have given users a fair amount of leeway when it comes to designing ones own pages. Understandably, webpages have to fit a very specific template, but it's when users attempt to make their auction pages fit outside of the template, it makes the layouts a headache to read.

This eBay seller is moving future, more specifically, bar stools. The product seems to be fairly solid, and had this been incorporated into a series of webpages, could convey all the necessary information to tell of all the features, advantages, and benefits of the products in question. But, being that eBay doesn't allow for multiple pages on one item, we have to read it all at once.

But what the heck does Michaelangelo's David have to do with bar stools?

NEW PEN CAM DIGITAL CAMERA / WEBCAM / CAMCORDER

No matter how good the price looks, ALWAYS check the shipping rate. Translation in clichéd terms that you've already heard: if it sounds to good to be true, gues what.

Looking for a digital camera? You've come to a good place. Not necessarily the RIGHT place, mind you, but it's a place nonetheless. Once you've gotten past the endless lists of people selling lists of camera wholesalers (usually a scam designed to make people think they are buying the actual item), they have off-brand trinkets like this one.

For $2.60, it sounds like a good deal, and the photos make it look like something that could quite literally fit in the palm of your hand. So, something that tiny should be pretty cheap to ship, right? Nope. Try over six times the startind bid price of the item.

Texas Bed & Breakfast by Ann Ruff, Gail Drago, Marji...

Yet another instance of my annoyance of eBay when trying to find truly bizarre crap, but instead I find reminders that eBay is largely a dumping ground for people trying to empty out their apartments for crap that nobody wants.

This enterprising individual is selling a guide to finding a good Texas Bed and Breakfast. For $0.29 (the Buy it Now Price), you can get a good tourist guide. That would have been great about 13 years ago.

With the advent of high-speed information, nothing is static, and printed and bound editions are obsolete. Suddenly, I'm reminded of a Simpsons episode where Bart and his friends are trying to find a state fair, only to find out that it's been closed for the past 20 years.

Orlando Kissimmee Disney Vacation Rental Home Villa

Yet again, a Orlando Rental home is huge on eBay, with some great values just waiting to be snapped up. I've always been curious about the level of amemities at rental facilities like hotels and the like, especially since you go to posh locations that are really heavily touristed.

This one in particular has most of the ammenities of HOME. In the list of all of the features, "This includes a large screen TV, DVD, VCR and Stereo system all for your entertainment pleasure." This is great, although I prefer not to go off to some foreign land and do what I usually do when I'm at home (surf the internet, watch TV, play video games).

Admittedly, after being out all day, the temptation to veg out in front of the tube would be pretty strong. But, it'd probably be more fun in a foreign country, when your favourite shows are now translated en Español.

GIRL FIGURE ACCESSORIES 1:18 diecast car truck anime 4

For race fans and those intrested in truck accessories (well, that's at least what eBay spat out when I punched in the keywords), we have what the eBay seller promises, that "they look so realistic that it adds an attractive addition to any collection."

Given that it's Japanese animation, doesn't that kinda negate the whole "realistic" angle? I'm a fan of anime art as much as the next guy, but one of the whole appeals of anime art is the level of cartoonishness. Women in general do not look like Major Motoko from Ghost in the Shell, and most Asian people don't have eyes as big as hard boiled eggs.

The eBayer goes on to state, "These Race Girls will have friends asking and admiring!" As these aren't necessarily based on licensed characters, it won't necessarily get me "admiring" per se. It will get me asking a lot of questions. Just not the ones the seller seems to intend.

Large Betty Ford Drug Rehab Clinic Beverly Hills

Yes, because drug rehabilitation happens to be a very fun experience, it's only fitting that someone is selling commemorative t-shirts for the event.

These shirts have been around for a while, although I suspect that the motive is more for poking fun at celebrities who end up falling off the wagon and into a whiskey truck, rather than every day folk for whom drug and alcohol problems can be more pronounced.

The comment was made in a Simpsons episode, where the family goes to New York and sees a musical journey of the Betty Ford Clinic, to which Bart comments that he wants to go to the Betty Ford Clinic when he grows up. Marge retorts for him to save up, given the costs.

DDR 200 pin Memory RAM for IBM Lenovo Thinkpad Computer

eBay is usually a pretty good spot for getting good deals on electronics and computer related products. This particular eBay seller is selling IBM memory modules for ThinkPad. Fairly competitively priced (okay, I'm just guessing because I'm feeling really lazy right now), but if you wonder where their profits are going, it's not into their market research.

eBay is comparable to MySpace in several respects, in that the fact that one has to conform to the company's templates, it is usually pretty difficult to put together clean layouts for pages. That, and you have a zillion 3rd party plugins and modules that one can add to their pages, it makes surfing on eBay a headache inducing experience.

This page in particular forces to you to listen to a pre-recorded audio clip. I frantically had to scroll down to the next page to find a way to turn it off. Not all pages have this option.

MTG - Unhinged Foil - Our Market Research x1 (NM)

I actually used to play this game quite a bit when I was younger, like when I didn't have responsibilities like jobs, student loans, rent, food, and the like to deal with. For those who are unaware, this is Magic the Gathering, a collectible card game from Wizards of the Coast. This is a huge time and money suck, as you have to constantly be purchasing cards in order to stay up-to-date.

They introduced two joke sets, "Unhinged" and "Unglued", where they had ridiculous cards that went outside of the regular game mechanics. Just a quick crash course: the objective of the game was to eliminate your opponents by running them out of cards or reducing their life points to 0, either through damage spells (ie: cast Lightning Bolt for 1 red mana for 3 damage) or creatures (summon Prodigal Sorcerer who can deal 1 damage).

The joke sets made it so you could do things like force your opponent to get you a drink, deal damage every time someone says "Sorry," or make a creature unstoppable if your opponent just happened to be wearing jeans. But, mostly the cards had a lot of inside jokes.

This one in particular (item #290117122217): "Our Market Research Shows that Players Like Really Long Card Names So We Made This Card To Have The Absolute Longest Card Name Ever Elemental."

USED HOME THEATER CHAIRS MOVIE THEATRE SEATING CINEMA

When I think of home theater seating, I typically think of a nice leather couch or recliner, something that I can sort of just lounge in while watching a DVD with my girlfriend or whatever. As much as the actual movie theater experience is nice, you can't do certain things like lie down while watching a movie.

But, for people with an exorbitantly large disposable income, there is the option of having actual movie theater style seats in the comfort of your own home, complete with seats that pop up when you get up to leave, so it's easier to get in and out.

But why is it that I can't shake the feeling that when this person is selling used home theatre chairs, they weren't manufactured specifically for household use, but actually for public use?

Admittedly, this seat is way too clean to have ever been in an actual public movie theater, there's that, there is that letter "G" that was embossed and bolted to the side of the chair...