And now a word from our sponsor...

DirectBuy is the leading members-only showroom and home design center that offers merchandise at manufacturer-direct prices. DirectBuy charges membership dues to join, thereby enabling members to purchase merchandise at manufacturer prices without traditional retail mark-up. It allows consumers to purchase brand-name merchandise at manufacturer-direct prices -- the same prices that manufacturers and distributors give to retail stores......Did you know that in the home furnishings area alone, stores enjoy a gross margin of 43.3% on average?

AMPHETIMINE/ENERGY FAT BURNERS SLIMMING PILLS/TABLETS

Supplements are not exactly a "dime a dozen" on eBay, but they're certainly plentiful. But as always, do your research. So, when you have energy pills and the title of the auction has the word "amphetamine" it, DEFINITELY do your research.

I've already ragged repeatedly on hoodia gordonii products, but it looks like the main active ingredient in this, gugulipid (also known as Commiphora wightii) is another potential dud, as initial studies show promise, but the larger studies fail to show results. It's all caveat emptor here, folks.

SHERATON HOTEL TEA SPOON

Sure, everybody does it, but does that mean it's okay that you're essentially selling stolen property on eBay?

While standard practice dictates that hotels will immediately charge you for items taken from the mini-bar (some will do so, even if the items aren't consumed), so far, hotels aren't charging for commonly pilfered items such as silverware, towels, or toiletries. But, when hotel deals are going for relatively sane rates, it might be safe to assume that they're making enough money that they aren't going to charge you for stolen eating utensils.

Wholesale List Tvs Laptops Mattress GPS Home Theater

Looking for anything in particular? A TV? A foam mattress? Home Theatre?

Keep looking, because you certainly won't find that here.

Wholesale lists are the eBay equivalent of Spam. Thankfully, the days of ambushing people and fooling them into buying what they think is that fancy new iPod or PS3 or whatever and instead they end up buying a CD with mostly dead contacts on it are long past. But they still proliferate. It seems like just about anybody can make a wholesale list and sell it these days. But as always, caveat emptor.

Personalized CAMERON Ball Point Pens Set of 4 Gr8t Gift

Imprinted promotional products are one of the great perks of the working world. Whether it be free pens, t-shirts, coffee mugs, stationery, gadgets, USB keychains or the like, they're always great fun. And best of all, they're FREE.

So, when you start looking at auctions like this one, you ever wonder if somebody's getting a little bit greedy? Especially when there's such a huge jump from the $5 opening bid to the $99 buy it now price? And, they give this crap away for free at conventions anyway. Anybody in the professional world will be loaded with this stuff. I must've been able to fill my wardrobe with all the free t-shirts I've obtained.

Barney Puzzle Friends Swing Set Fun BJ Baby Bop ~ NEW

I saw this and I thought, how OLD is this item?

After some quick research, much to my horror, this show is STILL ON. However, I do remember in the mid-90s when Barney bashing was all the rage. I even once saw a t-shirt depicting Barney chasing after children and eating them. I think I still have a copy of the Kill Barny comic book (named "Barny" instead of "Barney" to avoid a lawsuit).

Obviously, not a crap load of interest in a Barney and Friends Swing Sets, in puzzle for or otherwise.

NEW Dripping Tap Water Faucet Gag Prank Joke Drip SOUND

Prank items are quite easy to find on eBay. This one in particular, would probably be great for someone with Moen Faucets, and probably drive a person pretty batty.

The setups for these are pretty simple...you just set it up in a certain location and make sure it's hidden and out of the way. Just don't forget about it, or else the more intelligent would-be prank victim will discover it and use the nearest receptacle of trash or even the toilet to dispose of it.

Mystery box lot monster cable hdmi camera multi switch

Looking for cheap HDMI cable? Howabout a pile of random electronic crap?

The seller doesn't instill a lot of faith in the consumer that they're going to be getting their money's worth with this auction. As it is, he doesn't even LIST the items that arein this photo, which makes finding what you want that much more difficult. He just lists a few random items that may or may not be in the photo, and then just calls it mystery box.

As it is, the only recognizable item in this random pile of crap is a CPU cooling fan, and it's not even listed or mentioned anywhere in this auction.

S2000 HONDA CAR COVER

If you're looking for car covers, this guy is selling a few, specifically for a Honda S2000. A fairly mundane item, even though it's listed under "everything else" and "other," but it's his style of prose. Taking a gander at all of his other auctions shows that he's using eBay as an outlet to spread the word of the Lord.

And he has this on all of his auctions, whether it be a Gucci Makeup Bag, a cell phone, or a faux fur coat. I don't really know why, as this generally seems to have very little to do with the auction itself, merely a prayer that happens to be tacked on to these auctions. It's an interesting dichotomy, considering that the bible preaches that it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven, and yet he's mostly selling items associated with decadence and excess.

Amen.

S2000 HONDA CAR COVER

If you're looking for car covers, this guy is selling a few, specifically for a Honda S2000. A fairly mundane item, even though it's listed under "everything else" and "other," but it's his style of prose. Taking a gander at all of his other auctions shows that he's using eBay as an outlet to spread the word of the Lord.

And he has this on all of his auctions, whether it be a Gucci Makeup Bag, a cell phone, or a faux fur coat. I don't really know why, as this generally seems to have very little to do with the auction itself, merely a prayer that happens to be tacked on to these auctions. It's an interesting dichotomy, considering that the bible preaches that it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven, and yet he's mostly selling items associated with decadence and excess.

Amen.

RALEIGH HILLS OUTPATIENT Hat PIN drug alcohol rehab

Because spending your time in drug rehabs is such a laughing matter, this eBay seller has decided to capitalize on the sale of a vintage item by selling pins with "Raleigh Hills Outpatient" written on them.

Well, maybe if we didn't have well known celebrities like actors and musicians treating drug and alcohol treatment centers as such a joke, then maybe these would be something that is taken slightly seriously.

As it is, aren't these those kind of tokens that you're supposed to earn after going through 12-step counseling programs?

MICHAEL JORDAN NIKE AIR KNOWS 2 CARD SET BASEBALL/GOLF

Now THIS is a blast from the past.

As the speculator boom destroyed the trading card industry, the end result is that you will see people that amassed cards by the crate load and now are trying to unload them at a loss.

This is a little more reminiscent of the "Bo Knows Sports" advertising campaign at Nike, in which multidisciplinary athlete Bo Jackson excelled at all sports, in addition to two main sports, baseball and football.

Although best known for basketball, and more of a shill for Air Jordans rather than Nike Golf, Michael Jordan did some crossover in other sports as well, spending a brief stint in minor league baseball during his retirement and now spending time in celebrity golf tournaments. But these cards depict a much younger Michael Jordan, when these cards might've been worth more than the $0.01 that they're going for now.

Ceramic Smoking Baby SMOKES cigarettes + BONUS GIFT

Probably the LAST thing on your mind when you went to eBay and you were looking up baby gifts, but here we have a novelty smoking ceramic baby.

The seller quickly qualifies this by saying that "REAL BABIES SHOULD NEVER SMOKE," which kind of goes without saying. This earned a "What the hell is that" from my girlfriend when she saw I was looking for weird stuff on eBay. Yes, this is wrong on multiple, multiple levels.

There are certain types of people that would appreciate a gift like that. Those people probably do not have children of their own, or ever intend to have children of their own. Or EVER have children of their own, for that matter.

CROSS SILVER BALL/POINT/PEN BURKE MARKETING CORP ENGRAV

People on eBay are putting up things with the intent on making a profit, but when people just want to get junk out of their apartments, they call up on Craigslist. When I see postings like this, where the product has zero bids and the product is used and of minimal value to anyone else, then I wonder if these guys are just getting greedy.

Like, when a company starts giving out marketing pens for promoting their business, they'll usually be cheap little trinkets that cost very little for the business in question, and they'll be produced by the hundreds. And, they'll be given out for FREE. Sure, this looks like a nice pen, but most might not perceive the value the same way that it's being promoted.

Heck, the guy even admits he doesn't know how much ink is in there.

2 UMBRELLA HATS -GOLF-BBQ-CAMPING-FISHING-FUN! $4.98!

When searching for camping gear in eBay, I happened to stumble upon this entry here. I don't really expect that this is a serious piece of equipment that one would bring with them when roughing it in the woods, the auction itself is quite amusing, spelling mistakes notwithstanding. Among the more outlandish claims that this product can do (and of course, it's not meant to be taken seriously):

-Prevent head lice from sleeping in hotels
-Keeping your hair dry during a shower
-Reduce your impact velocity while in freefall
-Keeps your head dry when someone spits when pronouncing their Ps.

Pulsed Magnetic Can Crusher PLANS

Now this is kinda cool. Looking for a can crusher? Do you want to do more recycling? Now you "can."

Relying on just the power of magnetism, you can watch with delight as cans miraculously collapse under their own weight. No wait...they aren't actually selling the actual can crusher, they are just selling the plans.

I always thought that aluminum wasn't affected by magnetic fields (I remember watching an old "How Stuff Works" type video where a can separator determined which ones were aluminum based on whether or not they stuck to the magnetic conveyor belt), but if they actually do science demonstrations with this, why not. I guess you learn something new every day.

But wouldn't plans for making a magnetic can crusher be availabe on the internet? Like, for free?

"FACES WITHIN A WINE STAIN"

With wine of the month clubs, you can get wine sent to you on a monthly basis. For the serious connoisseur, this is a dream. But for less serious (or much, MUCH more serious), there is this.

While the likes of GoldenPalace.com have pretty much played out all of the whole Jesus Christ on a grilled cheese sandwich bit, occasionally we still do see the odd item on eBay where some freak arrangement of molecules forms something somewhat recognizable.

But, this guy is selling a stained box for a million dollars. THIS is what he's selling.


Even taking a closer look at the brown spot on the box and you can't even make out anything distinct in the spot. This is supposed to be a face in a stain, but you gotta look really, really close. And even still, I can't make out anything.

Lot 479 Scrabble Wood Wooden Letters Tiles Scrapbook

I've developed an interest in Scrabble fairly recently, having played Scrabulous on Facebook (which is now under threat of shutdown by Hasbro), but I have the worst habit of dropping tiles under the couch. Thankfully, my prayers have been answered.

Missing the Q-tile? You can replace it. Missing them all? Check this out. Mind you, with 479 tiles, you won't have many problems in completing your set. Which leave you the unanswered question as to what you do with the remaining 478 tiles once you replaced the missing Q.

Interestingly enough, there are 17 bidders lined up, which might indicate that they're using it for more than just Scrabble.

URINARY INCONTINENCE IN THE ASSISTED LIVING SETTING

Considering that video media is sometimes considered software, I suppose that this would qualify as "assisted living software", although a few things about this auction sorta bother me. One, is that the father is choosing to sell items through his son's estate through ebay. This just seems sorta tacky and tasteless. Two, the seller's level of grammatical and spelling skill. There are several instances with inappropriate use of possessive apostrophes.

And number three, just look at the box artwork! Dignity is a commodity very hard to come by when you require assisted living, and the VHS box (which appears to be still shrinkwrapped) shows a puddle of water. This is just plain old tasteless.

great 1947 America Fore home owners Insurance Ad

While home owners insurance may not be available on eBay, the advertisements certainly are. I'd like to think that this is an entirely niche market, although it really more seems that they're trying to clear out old magazines that were in the closet/cellar/basement and this is the only way they can attempt to make a profit on it. The words "trash and treasure" come to mind yet again.